I have those weekly, always feel so great, thinking i know it all.
Haha life is such a joke.
The last one: i realized it was me who suffered most and i know now.
I had a version of that one twenty some years ago sitting on a hill with Hetty Willemier.
But this one is the one!
And of course it is not me suffering most, i am especially blessed in life.
But i always have this excessive need of sleep. I think i got it! I will not sleep no more! Oh my god can you imagine the good life i will be living, no more wonderful cool sheets, finding a warm body in between them, oh glory, i give it all up for more energy. I am talking nonsense of course.
The point is, i have found why i love falling in love, no more falling in love is necessary , i can just open my heart by myself, like everybody always does ( meaning you all knew that , while i suffered in silence)
And it all has to do with being aware.... that I AM the observer.. Now this moment, my fingers type thoughts that I draw to the foreground of my mind, I am behind it all picking and choosing, loving or not, closing or opening, and the grass grows, and the music plays.
I can stop all the judgement in a single moment.
Glory, glory all is glory,
"wake up little Suzy
There is no suffering, none
Ha, and to know that when the wave crashes and washes over me, submerged in green water, not knowing if i ever breath again, which, don't worry, i will .
tired like i am now and i already laid naked in the warm sun on the coarse gravels and the music is turned up too loud lola... and she walked up to me and when you really don't know what or where but it's summer because the sun is hot and the breeze is a cool dream
i have no idea what this could be growing among tiny eyebrights and willowherbs with heavy eyelashes when you can't follow me, neither can i the thing was it always takes me a little of guard when they first see my killer legs in killer heels lololola and only after they gather up an instant of courage to ask me to dance, they see i am tall, much taller then them its a culvert graveyard it's the blond that is beautiful until she speaks it's the ordinary that is most fortunate the ugly duckling believe me she is a top model and days go by and i forgot all about it sweet sweet caroline and wait this is what counts i am just me and he was well... wrong
the water is rippled
all the things i want to tell you
they elude me now
following footsteps on bare rock
there are only traces left
from 15.000 years ago
that's young we learn
in geology class
sometimes my mind is bubbling over
now it's dark red
as popping bubbles in fir tree bark
when the water's calm
i wonder about justice
seeking justice does start wars
the black lake is so deep
i just can't see my own reflection
when there is no more words, no ripples
and no justice and your skin
pressed against mine
Now That is pure Joy
my beautiful lover most beautiful of all i dance for you always spinning faster rain trashing down rocks falling down the mountain boulders the size of treasure chests i adore you the sky is turning your eyes a lovely light brown mystery that i belong in your hair raven black waves that i get lost in don't you know that all my madness is a crazy witch hunt i twirl again again send me your music sing it loud so i will know
and i will find you and we will dance together and there is love that always was you most handsome that is what pulcherrima means both photos are not polemonium pulcherrimum top - wild blue flax middle - northern jacob's ladder the rain grew tired all was water now the boulders larger made up the ocean floor deep deep down don't ask me to get up again i am safe here underneath everything that exist pul-cher-rima